SENSORY PREFERENCE IDENTIFICATION
So far, we’ve spent a lot of time exposing things that have been visible all along. This is no exception. We hear people speak all the time, but we just didn’t know the value in the words hidden within their sentences.
This technique derives from a man named Walter Burke Barb, who, in the 1920s, wanted to create an understanding about how people learn differently.
Barb identified three ways we humans learn best:
Visual - watching or seeing
Auditory - hearing and listening
Kinesthetic - hands-on and doing
While these are great to identify learning modes, we can use them in a different way. Two therapists named Virginia Satir and Fritz Perls used these tools to identify communication styles in the early 1970s.
When we speak, we communicate using words that describe sensory experiences. All of us do this. We may speak mostly in visual, audio, or kinesthetic terms. When we speak with someone, they will quickly reveal their sensory preference through their language.
For example, if someone is describing that they don’t like a situation or person, you might hear it described using different sensory descriptions.
A visual person might say, “I just don’t see why. Something doesn’t look right to me.”
An auditory person might say, “I hear what you’re saying, but something didn’t sound right to me.”
A kinesthetic person might say, “I get that, but there’s just something that doesn’t feel right.”
In my analysis of over 3,400 hours of interviews and conversations, people tended to use sensory words within the first three minutes and fifteen seconds of interactions with new people in social settings. This makes it ideal for the six-minute window this book owes its name to.
When we hear someone use sensory words, it’s critical information. We should be adapting our communication to better resonate with the person. Not only is it more persuasive, but it also helps them to learn. Teachers, therapists, salespeople, and interrogators can all benefit from this invaluable technique.
Let’s examine a list of sensory words:
VISUAL:
AUDITORY:
KINESTHETIC:
These are all words we hear all the time in conversation. You’ll notice a trend when you speak to people: they will tend to use the same sensory preference all the time.
Our job is to identify their sensory preference and adapt our language to communicate with them. If you’re a visual person, and you’re speaking with a kinesthetic person, for instance, you’ll adapt to their behavior by using that person’s preferred sensory words.
Example: (sales)
You listen in on a call one of your junior salespeople is making with someone. As you listen, the customer on the phone is using all auditory (hearing) words. You hear phrases like, ‘ he mentioned that’, ‘let’s talk about it’, and ‘that other guy was a bit loud and proud.’ You know right away he’s an auditory person. However, your salesperson continues to use visual words when he communicates. You’re able to provide some feedback that could change his career.
Example: (courtroom)
You’ve got a witness on the stand who’s been thus far uncooperative and is having trouble remembering details about a crime they witnessed. Before you approach the witness, you glance at your legal pad and see the note you made that this person is kinesthetic. By asking more questions about temperature, clothing, and textures of objects at the crime scene, you’re able to trigger more memories than the witness thought they could recall.
Example: (conference call)
It’s 4 pm. You’re stuck on a video conference call with your office staff, and the boss is continuing to ramble, reducing productivity to a halt. You’d like to wrap things up. You know the boss is an auditory person, so you politely state, “I know everyone here has heard all the instructions, and listen, I think the team got your message loud and clear. That was really well said. Does anyone have any questions the boss needs to hear? I know he’s busy.”
Sensory preference doesn’t only reveal itself in spoken language. If you look online, people reveal all kinds of data from the 6MX process on their social media interactions. Before your next meeting, you can even take a look online and identify your client’s sensory preference and much more.
SUMMARY
Sensory words are not only how we communicate. These words, as you hear them, are revealing the secrets to how people need to be communicated with. Wherever you happen to be, you’ll hear sensory words every day. Let these words become more important to your brain as time passes. You’ll start hearing between the lines in no time at all.
In the next chapter, I’m going to show you a never-before-released technique I developed that allows you to do even more listening between the lines. It will also show you exactly how to persuade anyone with their own thoughts.